My Story

I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Her2 positive breast cancer Dec. 27th, 2011. I had three large tumors in my left breast, I also had two positive lymph nodes and so with 5 positive biopsies I started my journey. In the beginning, it was a whirlwind and within a week, I was getting a port and preparing for chemo and the rush to save my life was on. Eight months later (August 20th) after stopping chemo (12 sessions) and not having surgery (a suggested double mastectomy) or radiation like my doctors wanted me to, I sat at Cancer Treatment Centers of America in Illinois and heard the results of a mammogram, MRI, Pet Scan and blood tests were that they could find no cancer in my body. The nurses and doctors were baffled and no one could explain how I could have had this terrible cancer and it was now gone, except for me. I said the Lord healed me through prayers, education, diet and supplements. I started this blog when I was first diagnosed, it is not just about on cancer, but my life and day-to-day thoughts and activities. There are suggested websites, blogs, videos and more here that I believe can benefit those dealing with cancer and those who want to be preventative. My hope is that you and yours will learn, be encouraged and healed. My family prays every night for those with cancer and that you will be not only be healed but that you will live long and happy lives.
Please check out the right side and scroll down to "This blog" for highlights.
Love and Blessings on your journey.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Trusting God - November 22, 2012

         Okay, so I am up in the middle of the night thinking about big and deep questions again. Tonight I am wondering how to determine whether a person is someone you can trust and depend on and if not how we can know and plan accordingly.

          It seems in life more than ever before that lies surround us and ignorance for the truth is either completely missing (hidden from many) or that people just don’t care anymore.

           I think back to scandals like the O.J. Simpson Trial, The Clinton and Monica Lewinski mess, the most recent Benghazi lies from the government, the election, the General Petraeus affair and more and wonder why we don’t hold people to the standards we use to. If the things that were accepted in society as social norms now were even contemplated in the past (the beginning of our country until the last 40 years) people would have been disgusted with the blatant disregard for what is right.  I know that it is all turning away from Christ and his truths to follow Satan and our own flesh. Satan has lied to us (our society) for so long we accept his lies as truth. The truth has been spun and it’s going so fast we can’t even recognize it anymore.

          The truth (the Word of God) has become a gray area, twisted and manipulated to fit our own agendas. Yes, the days of Little House on the Prairie are long gone and words like life, respect, honor, justice, liberty, modesty, marriage etc. just don’t hold their value and place in our society the way they used to.  Now, how can we know and trust a person? Trust, not just in politics, but in our own lives?
          Recently I have had two conversations where the person seemed oh so sweet and kind, but there were warning signs in my spirit going up. I wondered, “Is this person telling me the truth?”, “Can this person be trusted?” Is this Satan trying to trick me into trusting this person, or is it the Holy Spirit warning me not to? I even mentioned my concern to the woman. Now thinking about all of this at 3:30 in the morning, I decided to get up and search out the truth.
          I’ll give a quick break down of what I believe. With feelings within yourself - Guilt usually comes from Satan and Conviction comes from the Lord. Satan accuses based on lies and the Holy Spirit is a defender and helper to God’s people. Satan is a liar tries to distance us from the Lord. The Holy Spirit is all about truth and has the desire to bring the individual to repentance and a closer relationship with the Lord. I can always go back to the word of God and see in clear black and white that I am loved, forgiven and a work in progress and things like that help me when I start to feel guilty because I did X wrong and I replay it over and over in my head. Usually it is a scheme from Satan to get me off what is important and focus on the work at hand. Because Satan knows if I am busy focusing on stupid little things here and there I will not be doing the Lord’s work.
          Now, here’s the question - How do I/we know if someone else’s words are true and trustworthy?  How can we depend on what someone says? People get married saying they will be married for life and then get divorce and their word and intentions fall thorough completely. I think it’s more than 50% of all marriages end in divorce now. I doubt those people at standing at the front of the church giving that kiss ever thought they would be part of that. No, they had good intentions and a plan for a life together, but somewhere something went wrong. I personally believe that the majority of marriages fail in society today because we are a “ME! “ society with everyone caring more about their own wants/needs than the wants/needs of other,  but I regress.
Here is what I have found this morning on this whole subject of trust.
·       “All the works of men, even the most sanctified, are sin.” – Luther

·        Micah 7:5 - Do not trust in a neighbor; Do not have confidence in a friend. From her who lies in your bosom Guard your lips.

·         Jeremiah 9:4 – “Let everyone be on guard against his neighbor, And do not trust any brother; Because every brother deals craftily, And every neighbor goes about as a slanderer.

·        Psalms 37:5 – Commit everything you do to the LORD. Trust him, and he will help you.
So, if you’ve just read these few scriptures alone you have realized that God is the only one whom we can truly trust. I have been trapped in the lie that people should be trusted, right along with the commercials that say I deserve a vacation. I don’t deserve anything and none of us do. Jesus has pardoned us for our sins, but that doesn’t mean we are deserving. Okay regressing again.
          Recently my trust in people was broken, I was shocked, hurt and disappointed. I am now learning that I should have been expecting it and not surprised at all.  I should be giving way more of my time, energy, words, concerns and more to the Lord and relying on man less as we will always be disappointed. Is this sad and unfortunate? Sure it is, but we live in this very sinful world with the prince of darkness and sinful fallen people.
         If people in our lives disappoint us, we have to realize that we had our trust in the wrong place. We need to “Trust in Him at all times, O people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah. Psalms 62:8”.
          I think it has taken me 41 years and learning this here and there, repeatedly to really conclude that I will not trust man again and in fact, I will be on the look for Satan’s schemes through people next time.
·         For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12.

·         Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8

           Knowing something with your head and believing something with your heart and soul are definitely two different things. I am so grateful to God for all the difficult times that bring me closer to Him and His truth.
           Okay so that’s it for today, but before I go I wanted to share two scriptures on honoring your leaders from the last post:
1 Timothy 2:1-3 – I urge, then, first of all, that petitions, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for all people— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior.
1 Peter 2:13-14 Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human authority: whether to the emperor, as the supreme authority, or to governors, who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right.

Happy Thanksgiving!
Grandpa tell me about the good ole days by the Judds

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