My Story

I was diagnosed with Stage 3 Her2 positive breast cancer Dec. 27th, 2011. I had three large tumors in my left breast, I also had two positive lymph nodes and so with 5 positive biopsies I started my journey. In the beginning, it was a whirlwind and within a week, I was getting a port and preparing for chemo and the rush to save my life was on. Eight months later (August 20th) after stopping chemo (12 sessions) and not having surgery (a suggested double mastectomy) or radiation like my doctors wanted me to, I sat at Cancer Treatment Centers of America in Illinois and heard the results of a mammogram, MRI, Pet Scan and blood tests were that they could find no cancer in my body. The nurses and doctors were baffled and no one could explain how I could have had this terrible cancer and it was now gone, except for me. I said the Lord healed me through prayers, education, diet and supplements. I started this blog when I was first diagnosed, it is not just about on cancer, but my life and day-to-day thoughts and activities. There are suggested websites, blogs, videos and more here that I believe can benefit those dealing with cancer and those who want to be preventative. My hope is that you and yours will learn, be encouraged and healed. My family prays every night for those with cancer and that you will be not only be healed but that you will live long and happy lives.
Please check out the right side and scroll down to "This blog" for highlights.
Love and Blessings on your journey.

Friday, January 25, 2013

Clear Skies & Rainbows Ahead - January 25, 2013

You know we all have our issues and problems. Some seem overwhelming at times and you struggle just to breathe. I have been there so many times in my life - when circumstances seem so sad, so disappointing, so shaky and scary. Recently I have had several people in my life going through so many difficult things. My friend, Barbara recently lost her brother to cancer and cries saying that “He was larger than life” and she misses him so much. My friend, Allison struggles with being a single mom and the difficulties of communication with her ex-husband. My friend Sharon has a sickly father- in-law and she and her husband have the stress and daily burdens of being his only care givers. Stress, sadness and disappointment are so real and strong throughout this life. (I write their names, hoping you will pray for them.)
I had to go through some crud in my life recently with some ladies that believed some unbelievable things about me and then said and did some unkind things in reaction. The thing is, since I knew the truth and was committed to the vision and direction that God placed on my heart, I did what He said to do, things worked out for the best and were abundantly blessed. The reason it was so easy for me to go forward and not get bogged down with the crud long term was because I knew what was right, true, and what God wanted from me. It was like a bad storm that quickly turned into a beautiful sky. A gentle breeze showed up in the warm sunshine and the birds sang their song. I looked up to the sky the other day and thought back to how that experience made me stronger, smarter and more prepared for the next and I thanked God for that storm. Now, I am actually preparing for the next storm (battle) and working on putting on the armor or God. (Ephesians 6:10-18)

For years I blamed God for the negative things that happened to me in life. I saw no purpose in tragedy and heartbreak at all and I wondered how God could allow me to go through such bad things if he really cared and loved me. I played the well-learned woe is me card and just took life as it came. (I still do this sometimes) No specific thing happened, however through bible studies, conversations and revelations from the Holy Spirit, I have changed my outlook.

God has a reason for each of our trails and it isn’t about us. It’s about Him. The reason we breathe is to bring God glory. Life isn’t about us and our struggles and our problems. It’s about overcoming them and striving to give the Lord glory in all that we do. This lesson is something that I have really only truly wrapped my head around over the last two to three years. I realize that every time I make everything about me, I am ignoring God and the purpose of my existence and losing out on a lesson and growth. I lose out on the refinement that makes me more Christ-like when I am only concerned with my own flesh and not His will for my heart and soul.

I’m not saying we have to be live like monks and ignore our needs and desires, but when the trails come and the desire is to take care of ourselves and fall into the “woe is me” trap that Satan is so great at convincing us we need, instead of talking care of what God wants us to, well then there is a disconnect from the truth. It’s like we are sabotaging ourselves and stunting our spiritual growth.

I am not saying that we have to be happy all the time and float around like everything is perfect either. However, I truly believe that if you focus on this truth of life and that it’s not about us, but instead God, that it does make things easier. On Wednesday night  I lost my phone. I thought that perhaps someone at church must have taken it. I looked everywhere for it and it just wasn't there. I was sad it was gone and frustrated that I might have lost all the contacts, pictures, and that I’d have to spend money on a new one, but I didn't wallow around replaying it over and over like I would have before. I went up to the church yesterday to look for it and I prayed the whole way there that I would find it, but when I didn’t, I was like okay “God you are in control, if you wanted me to find it, I would have.” I was so happy with my growth yesterday when I quickly assessed, learned and moved forward. I know this trial was small and just the loss of a phone, but none the less, I know it was a victory for me. This morning I found my phone tucked away in a small recess of my laptop bag. Praise the Lord!  Just not having it all day Thursday was terrible.

Having cancer and the stress of doctors visits, testing, treatments, etc. can be so taxing. When you are just so plain tired you don’t even want to get up out of bed and you feel like you are so sad and scared, it’s easy to feel as though the storm will never end. I hope that if you have cancer or another trial in life right now that you remember all the rainbows and beautiful skies that come after the storms and how God can work all things together for His glory. I hope that you will remember that this life is short and even if your days will be shorter than you anticipated and hoped for - that it’s not about you. Please remember that this life was never really yours to start with. It’s God’s. He knows best, He loves you and he is in control of everything.

Romans 8:28 - And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
2 Samuel 22:4 - I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies. (including the disease of cancer)

You gotta watch how this 26 year old man Garrett Williamson's learned about the power of God and realize that through testing and trials - triumph comes.

In Job 37 – You can see that God controls the storms.
“At this my heart pounds
    and leaps from its place.
Listen! Listen to the roar of his voice,
    to the rumbling that comes from his mouth.
He unleashes his lightning beneath the whole heaven
    and sends it to the ends of the earth.
After that comes the sound of his roar;
    he thunders with his majestic voice.
When his voice resounds,
    he holds nothing back.
God’s voice thunders in marvelous ways;
    he does great things beyond our understanding.
He says to the snow, ‘Fall on the earth,’
    and to the rain shower, ‘Be a mighty downpour.’
So that everyone he has made may know his work,
    he stops all people from their labor.
The animals take cover;
    they remain in their dens.
The tempest comes out from its chamber,
    the cold from the driving winds.
10 The breath of God produces ice,
    and the broad waters become frozen.
11 He loads the clouds with moisture;
    he scatters his lightning through them.
12 At his direction they swirl around
    over the face of the whole earth
    to do whatever he commands them.
13 He brings the clouds to punish people,
    or to water his earth and show his love.
14 “Listen to this, Job;
    stop and consider God’s wonders.
15 Do you know how God controls the clouds

    and makes his lightning flash?
16 Do you know how the clouds hang poised,
    those wonders of him who has perfect knowledge?
17 You who swelter in your clothes
    when the land lies hushed under the south wind,
18 can you join him in spreading out the skies,
    hard as a mirror of cast bronze?
19 “Tell us what we should say to him;
    we cannot draw up our case because of our darkness.
20 Should he be told that I want to speak?

    Would anyone ask to be swallowed up?
21 Now no one can look at the sun,
    bright as it is in the skies
    after the wind has swept them clean.

22 Out of the north he comes in golden splendor;
    God comes in awesome majesty.
23 The Almighty is beyond our reach and exalted in power;
    in his justice and great righteousness, he does not oppress.
24 Therefore, people revere him,
    for does he not have regard for all the wise in heart?”

It’s all about giving up control to Him and giving him praise in whatever circumstances you may find yourself.

Enjoy the skies today, whatever they may be.


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